Lexington, KY- The UK Police Department issued a crime bulletin Wednesday, warning students of fourth-degree assaults that have occurred on campus early this week.In the bulletin, UKPD stated that the assaults occurred Monday evening in the basement of the William T. Young Library.The bulletin said, “In both incidents the victims reported that the suspect crawled under the study desk and used an unknown object to puncture their feet.”UK spokeswoman Kathy Johnson said in an email to the Kernel that both victims were females wearing sandals.
This is a fucking joke right? Like nobody can be that desperate that they army crawl under chicks cubicles and stab them in the feet to get a nut. That shit can't be true. I tell you who it wasn't, Rex Ryan. That fat bastard would have taken toe jam samples and clipped there toenails and all other kinds of wierd shit before he stabbed some poor innocent chick in the foot. How the fuck can this sicko get away with this? He is in a library, under a desk, stabbing people in the feet and somehow nobody saw him? I'm no detective but have watched enough First 48 to know that I'd have this anti-Rex Ryan caught in about 4.7 seconds. No questions asked.
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