Cincinnati -
Queen City Sausage is throwing its first festival this year, celebrating brats, metts, smoked sausages, goetta and other Cincinnati-style sausages. It will be held on the Riverfront Levee, just below the Aquarium, July 15, 16, and 17.
There will be over 20 different ways to eat Queen City products at the festival, and there are lots of other local names participating. Christian Moerlein will be there; Mick Noll has created a couple of special sausage preparations; The Colonial Cottage will serve an Italian sausage coney.
You want to know how not to get guys to go to your festival? Call it the Queen City Sausage Festival. This seems like it should just be Marketing 101. I'm pretty sure your target audience here is a bunch of fat, middle-aged, beer gut toting male slobs. So one way not to get that demographic into your booths is to announce the event as one giant Sausage Fest. The only smoke that is gonig to be at this festival is going to be coming from some fat hillbilly's grill. And that ain't good if you're trying to pack the house for this thing. If one of my friends came up to me and said, "Hey RBG, let's go check out this sausage fest down on the river," my first thought would be to punch that friend right in his mouth. My second thought would be to send him off to that gay conversion camp that Butters had to go to after he told his parents he was bi-curious. And my third thought would be, that there is some sort of rape wagon down there. Because nothing says sexual predator like "Sausage Fest on the River." I'm not falling for that trap...not again.
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