How Much Money Would You Have to Have in Your Wallet to Go Diving in the Sewer After It

 

CERES, Calif. -- A Ceres man dropped his wallet inside a manhole and got stuck trying to fetch it, police said.

Jared Medeiros, 21, was in head first when Ceres police discovered two legs flailing in the air Friday. When police tried to pull him out, his waist wouldn’t budge from the tunnel.

The fire department had to assist to pull him out. When they did, about 40 minutes had passed. They assessed his medical condition and found some minor scrapes and contusions. Police said he was slightly intoxicated but not impaired.

How much money would you have to have in your wallet for you to go diving into the sewer after it? $100? $200? I'm thinking it might have to be somewhere north of $250 before the RBG is going swimming in the sewer with all the rats and mutant turtles and shit. If I'm walking home from the bar and my wallet falls into the sewer I'm just going to chalk that one up as a loss and go order new credit cards and call it a night. Because there is nothing that will blow your chances with a chick faster than being stuck in the sewer for 40 minutes while your legs flail around while you wait for the police to cut you out. Seen it a thousand times.